One of the many things we see when women are eager for sympathy and attention, is that they lie.
As a passionate advocate against domestic violence, I have also been conned by women who claim to have been abused – just because they wanted to spite a man, on their way out of a marriage.
When Abasiama Eminue decided to walk out of her marriage, she claimed that her husband’s people were making her miserable. People know her husband’s character, so the domestic violence line would not have flown. So, she tried the next best line – a bit more believable, because a) many Nigerian women are suffering at the hands of their husband’s family; and b) it appears people like to believe that the husband’s family is always bad. So, that’s what she said. Oh, and that she was “too classy to live in Owerri” where she met her pastor husband. There must be something in the capital of Imo State, that repels people who hold a First Class degree in French. She knew her worth, she whimpered. She was determined to ensure she was paid.
Which was what she focused on, when she made her way to Lagos.
I remember reading this book about a character called Mr. B (I think they had a television series as well), in which they said the streets of Lagos were paved with gold.
I admire a woman who hustles; I hustle and have no qualms about it.
But when a woman deliberately seeks out married men who are as stupid as she is, to fund her materialistic lifestyle, yet puts in a lot of effort to pretend she’s a saint – cue religious posts on Facebook and other aspects of social media – things can get a bit confusing, even for her. That’s probably why choosing the Facebook name of “Jesus Chic” made sense, to this woman who was bent on getting what she is worth.
The thing about having a false sense of the knowledge of your worth, is the delusion it fosters. So desperate was Ms. Eminue to reap where she did not sow and unsatisfied with the gifts of her lovers (which included a rented serviced apartment in Lekki), that she pretended to be ‘into events, party favours, fabrics, and accessories’. She called her scam operation ‘Graziella Lifestyle’.
I heard that when you tell the truth, you don’t have to remember what you said before. Just like if you lie once, you’ll have to invent more lies to cover yourself. Abasiama must have heard the second part too, because she proceeded to create elaborate lies to cover her previous fibs. Unfortunately, she kept lying herself into a bigger hole.
For instance, it is difficult for this eternally busy woman, to remember who gave her a gift of $10,000 in cash “to support her business” – one day, that it was her estranged husband; the next, it’s her father; then, it’s just a ‘generous friend’. Don’t we all wish we had such ‘generous friends’, especially in this economy that is not smiling with anybody? That thing about telling the truth leading to not needing to remember the previous thing you said, eh?
It must also be one reason for or manifestation of split personalities … one minute on Facebook, praising ‘god’. The next, planning a getaway trip to the United States, to get pregnant with and birth a married lover’s baby. Yet, the next, pretending to be devastated on social media when the said married lover dies right in front of your house. In some climes, law enforcement agents would have gotten involved because they’d want to know exactly how a man just happened to enter his car in front of the house of his lover (who happened to have certain documents relating to properties and assets) and die. But then, part of the Nigerian culture is to ‘leave it for god’ when someone dies in unusual or mysterious circumstances; I should know – my father was assassinated and 18 years later, we’re no closer to getting a confession, an arrest or anything. I mean, if someone dies in front of your house, it makes sense to call the police, right? Unless … never mind; forget I said anything …
One of the things that gives a person credibility, is owning (or being seen to own) a business. Enter ‘Graziella Lifestyle’. Sounds chic, unassuming and exotic, right? Except that it’s a shell – just like its owner. Abasiama Eminue is the kind of woman who will order the most inferior beads for a client, even if she has been warned outright by the bead-maker that they are inferior; charge the client for the best quality beads; lie to the client; ask the bead-maker to lie to the client, when the client finds out; block the client on social media; then go on a radio show of someone she hates and fears, to whine about fake friends.
She is the kind of person who will take pains to create personae that she can’t even keep up with. So, she needs to drag other people into her mess and tell lies to smear them, as she lies and steals her way from one business transaction to the next.
Abasiama is the woman who will lie about things that a person really has no reason to lie about, leaving you in doubt about her mental status; even volunteering information that nobody has asked for – in a bid to feel good about herself. She represents one of Nigeria’s maladies – an admittedly physically appealing woman, with a First Class degree in French (so, you would be forgiven for assuming she actually has a brain and works hard), who seems to always need ‘saving’ and feels entitled to other people’s money …
Rejoinders, robust replies and vociferous denials are welcome.